The Road Tape Mystique

The Road Tape.

There was once a time if I were to hear the phrase, "Hey, I made a road tape for you..." I would feel either extreme excitement or extreme trepidation. See, back in the day, you either hoped for or feared The Road Tape.

The Road Tape was a token of affection, and frequently a very loaded token. Yet, The Road Tape frequently came from two sources, those for whom you felt reciprocal affection and those for whom you did not.

The Road Tape was a risky token. As I've previously mentioned, song choices in a particular context become highly personal things-snippets of the music collector's soul made manifest in a theme, ballad, or anthem. When someone compiles a collection for a fresh object of affection, they are giving over a gift of their heart, both red and raw.

You say you cannot appreciate the significance of which I speak? What fresh faced little kittens and pups you are...Clearly you have not lived, you have not loved, and you have never had to truly disappoint. That being said, I strongly suggest you locate a copy of Nick Hornby's HIGH FIDELITY: A NOVEL. Find a coffee shop or park bench, bus depot or mossy hillock and give yourself over to it. It's a quick read. If reading isn't your thing, I pity you-but at least do yourself the courtesy of sitting down to watch the film starring John Cusack. It's a more than adequate adaptation. But do it on your own time, I need to keep moving here...

Each and every time I plunged head-first into the swirling pools of romance, a new Road Tape for the party in question was seldom far from inception. I spend hours making up The Playlist; which songs best act as an Entre Act, Act One, Act Two...and so forth. And, yes, I did try to design the content like a theatrical production (by this time I WAS a student of the theatre, after all). Oh, I could write my own poems for that other party, draw them a picture, sing them a song (and in many cases I would do it in all eventuality) but The Road Tape was Def-Con One, it was the First Deployment, it was the beach head-With your Road Tape you dipped your toes in the water to test the temp and current, before leaping in.

Which made it all the more painful if you had one ounce of empathy and were in receipt of The Road Tape from a party for whose affection you did NOT share.

...because you couldn't simply GIVE IT BACK. You had to take it home, you had to listen to it, and you had to do your ever best to stuff the sensations of guilt you experienced as you heard those tunes (so lovingly assembled) that gave you a peek into that other person's very tender, very vulnerable soul.


I need not remind you it is 2007, and recordings made on magnetic tape are becoming as common as snail darters. They are becoming artifacts of courtships past like ornamental fans, root beer lip-gloss, and bundling boards. But I have a few still in my possession. I have a few that represent both sides of the relationship equation. I cannot tell you how many I made for other people, but I have no doubt they are legion.

Why I haven't thrown many of these out years ago I not know. But like I said, they are artifacts of times past and I have a love of history, the more personal the better. I have one sitting on the desk next to me. I am fairly certain it was the last such tape made for me by another person, compiled by a woman in 1989 or 1990, somewhere in there-on the cusp of an era's end in more ways than one.

I am not going to name any names, but I will say that it was indeed one of those tapes. When she gave it to me, I felt a twinge of guilt, because I knew exactly what it meant. And it meant something I knew I would ultimately be unable to reciprocate. Maybe that is WHY I have held on to it for so long. I felt obliged to treat it with a certain amount of respect. It is an artifact, after all.

Oh, I suppose you want to know what is on the tape don't you--you inquisitive little imps? Since it has been a dog's life since I spoke with this woman at any length, and she didn't feel too keen on playing Catherine-Zeta Jones to my John Cusack when last I emailed her-perhaps I'll spill...

TITLE: I HOPE YOU GOT...FAT
Side A
˙ David Bowie-Changes
˙ Jevette Steele-Calling You (Theme from Bagdad CafÇ)
˙ Sting-Message In A Bottle (Live-Accoustic) The Secret Policeman's Other Ball
˙ Jeff Beck and Eric Clapton-- Cause We've Ended As Lovers (Instrumental) The Secret Policemen's Other Ball
˙ Van Morrison-Moondance
˙ Ivan Neville-Why Can't I Fall In Love?
˙ The SugarCubes-Birthday
˙ The Pixies-Wave of Mutilation (UK Surf)
˙ Tears For Fears-Everybody Wants To Rule The World
˙ Pink Floyd-Comfortably Numb
Side B
˙ David Bowie-Fame
˙ The Violent Femmes-Fat
˙ Sinead O'Connor-I Want Your Hands On Me
˙ The The-Armageddon Days (Are Here Again)
˙ The Sugarcubes-Deus
˙ The Violent Femmes-Mother Of A Girl
˙ Concrete Blonde-Everybody Knows
˙ The The-Kingdom of Rain
˙ Brian Ferry-Same Old Scene
˙ Loggins and Messina-House on Pooh Corner
˙ David Bowie-Changes (Live)


Without delving too deeply below the surface of this collection, its safe to say this is a really interesting mix. And, I wonder, if I had not prefaced this list by telling you the nature of my relationship with the maker, would you have been able to make a healthy inference as to ours?

I think it advisable to simply overlook the Loggins and Messina track--Fuck me, I have NO IDEA what that tune is saying-maybe I don't want to.

Clearly the maker of this tape was a seasoned Maker Of Road Tapes. There is a theme here, and herein we find tunes that represent acts and even scene changes. My analytical skills also have told me (over the years) that there was a very strong subtext dealing with this person's frustration in establishing long-term relationships (I could be wrong-God knows I would be the last person to even attempt some kind of objectivity here). Most of all, this tape has a Prologue and an Epilog in the Bowie song, "Changes," a song very dear to many people and a tune deeply rooted in our cultural core. I think the use of the Bowie tracks says something very positive and insightful about this person in that she opened and closed her tape with two different versions of the song. Sometimes I felt that with this tape she was telling me about her losses, struggles, frustrations, but also held onto a certain sense of optimism and openness to change.

I'll leave the rest of the analysis up to you.

I'm feeling unquestionably full of crap right now.

More Later,
Coletrane.