Anthem-Ology, Part I

Hey All,

Present and of late, I have been polling those near and dear to me regarding some music-related terminology. The discussions have been fruitful and amusing but, frankly, resolved very little of my confusion and may very well have created even more.

What is an Anthem? The common understanding found in Webster's and elsewhere a) a hymn or praise of glory, b) a sacred composition (set to words from the Bible). We know the national anthem (or OF it, I imagine), and a hymn that habitually begins a religious service can be considered an anthem.

Clearly my understanding of the definition of Anthem has been in a severe state of torque from early on. You see, I have always thought of pop songs with narrative through line and wide dramatic scope as Anthem.

I always thought Don Mclean's American Pie was publicly considered one of the greatest rock anthems ever written. Now I learn that it isn't even an anthem and, according to close friends, there may be very little about the song worthy of being called great. Where did I get this "anthem" notion, I wonder? Was it some bald-faced comment made by a DJ on local AM Radio I listened to in my youth?

Or was it something more gross and insidious, like Alanis Morrisette erroneously defining the concept of irony, not once, but multiple times? Good God, I shudder to think of how a generation of music fans are now unable to distinguish the difference between bad luck, hypocrisy, and a freaking literary stylistic device!

Western civilization is falling.

I find few things more frustrating than the discovery your understanding of a thing has been in error for a dog's life. I know it's not that big a deal, but why the hell didn't anyone every correct me long ago?

It would have been so easy...

"No, dude, American Pie is not a Rock Anthem."

"No shit? Then, what kind of song is it?"

"Long, dude, long and tedious."

"I've always like the imagery in the lyrics, the story, and the chorus is catchy as hell..."

"Just too annoying, man."

The discussion frequently bogged because I'd encounter resistance to even my appreciation of the song. That was damn frustrating, even my dear friend, R'chaard was quick to supply, "Too bad it's such an insipid melody and boring narrative. (Sorry--perhaps I dislike the song because the Chronal Walkabout it triggers leads invariably to grade school: a period so bleak that the Bicentennial and "Space: 1999" are the undisputed highlights."

...he's snarkier than I, believe it if you can...

Go ahead and Google the phrase Rock Anthem, go ahead, I'll wait...

So you Google the phrase and what do you find? Songs that celebrate Rock and Roll in and of it self with lists of Rock Tunes devoted to Rock.

But, as per usual, I think R'Chaard was a step ahead of me...


"Now that I've given some thought to the idea of rock anthems, it
seems to me that an anthem is a piece that expresses and celebrates
a sentiment that all the listeners already have. It doesn't seek to
convince--or if it does, it does so only through strength of numbers
and peer pressure. Almost everyone feels patriotic during the
national anthem. Those who don't are at least aware that everyone
else thinks they SHOULD feel patriotic.

Maybe this explains why I think rock anthems are all rubbish. The
sentiments they express and celebrate are at best, self-evident; at
worst, stupid. 'It's fun to rock out.' Well obviously. If it wasn't,
you wouldn't be surrounded by 29,999 other people doing exactly the
same thing. 'It's good to thumb your nose at authority,' provided
it's not the band's authority to dictate the emotional state and
fashion sense of you and the other 29,999. 'It's good to be uniquely
yourself.' 29,999.

Odd then, that Born to Run strikes me as a good rock anthem to the "concept" of New Jersey. Sure, "this town rips the bones from your
back," but I find myself thinking "Yeah New Jersey's a dump, but
Springsteen is perceptive enough to see that and to write this song
and this song is fucking brilliant and Springsteen's from there so
if he's from there, NJ must be the BEST!" Maybe?"

I think there was a syllogism in there...

So, a genuine anthem is a tune that celebrates its own nature? A Rock Anthem is reinforces Rock. A Catholic Anthem reinforces Catholic Faith; a National Anthem reinforces a Nation. I know I made the syllogism unnecessarily complicated. I made this syllogism, and I made the syllogism unnecessarily complicated, therefore I am an unnecessarily complicated human being...or, something like that.

So Don Mclean's American Pie? What is it? We're told that Mclean was inspired by the death for rock and roll pioneer, Buddy Holly. The song tracks the course of the narrator's very personal experience of loss,

"When I read about his widowed bride,
But something touched me deep inside
The day the music died"

To a broader loss of cultural identity,

"Now for ten years we've been on our own
And moss grows fat on a rollin' stone,
But that's not how it used to be.
When the jester sang for the king and queen,
In a coat he borrowed from James Dean
And a voice that came from you and me..."

One wonders if he's talking about Buddy Holly anymore...

"And in the streets: the children screamed,
The lovers cried, and the poets dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
The church bells all were broken.
And the three men I admire most:
The father, son, and the holy ghost,
They caught the last train for the coast
The day the music died."

The song appears to expand in scope from the particular to the general, and become something that voices a resentful acknowledgement of our culture's turning of the corner into a new phase of existence. Don Mclean's American Pie is not a Rock Anthem, per se, its not a song built to celebrate the joy of rocking and rolling, it's an anthem about Rock's place in our culture. It's a song about how rock and roll is present in our transition out of an era of naivetÇ and innocence.

See, its true what Grandma used to say, "You kids and your rock and roll, it'll all end in tears..."

...sorry, that was more work than I anticipated. Hurt my frontal lobes, there...

Tune in next week when Coletrane opens his mouth and inserts his foot clean up to his pasty white thigh in an effort to define a ballad.

Can you believe they pay me for this?

More later,
Coletrane.